for Falmouth Wave, November 2021

More and more people and institutions are describing what happens to us in autumn as a mental illness. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) may be a neat name for some difficult feelings we experience at this time of year, but perhaps we should be wary of confusing neatness with truth. 

Some people experience seasonal change more keenly than others. Many of us find the winter months incredibly hard. Still, since all living things are affected by the seasons, I’m beginning to wonder if the real disorder results from attempting to carry on in the middle of winter as if it’s high summer. Perhaps we could call this WIND: Winter Normality Disorder!

In my work, I see the impact of ‘disorder messages’ on people every day; implying that there’s something wrong with being tired, hungry and low in the colder, darker months can add guilt, shame and anxiety to strained emotional loads. Instead, it can be helpful to practice self-compassion and set healthier expectations by following nature’s lead.

nature knows how to rest

If you look at trees and shrubs in the winter, you’ll see their buds are set. Now is not the time for sending out tendrils or sprouting tender leaves. A cold winter will kill off the pests in time for an abundant spring. Right now, nature is resting, and it’s only natural that we feel like resting too.

If we look at any other mammal in our timezone, we’re likely to find them building up layers of fat and getting lots of sleep. Squirrels aren’t lazy or greedy; they’re intuitive survivors, and so are we. 

acknowledging our needs

Let’s give ourselves the space and time to recognise that sometimes all we want to do is lie under several blankets, perhaps with a like-minded dog or cat, and eat. Our ancestors conserved energy at this time of year, relying on stores gathered at harvest time. We may be fortunate enough to have access to our favourite foods in minutes, but our bodies remain seasonally programmed. 

Electricity makes it possible for us to work and play at any time of day, all year round, but that doesn’t mean that we should or that we’re disordered if we don’t. It can be helpful to remember that, in evolutionary terms, we’ve had the electric light for a nano-second. 

emotional wellbeing in winter

Of course, needs that make us less productive: afternoon naps, a slower pace, leisurely mealtimes are hard to reconcile with modern life. But, over the years, I’ve found three things particularly helpful in preserving emotional wellbeing: gratitude, time in nature, and conversation.

I’ve been practising gratitude for four years now and can’t overstate how helpful it is to notice what’s good when things feel tough. Of course, you don’t need a group to practise gratitude, but reading other people’s lists can be very heartening. The Lifetime Therapy Gratitude Practice on Facebook is a free private community you’re welcome to join.

Lifetime Therapy Gratitude Practice link:

Getting outside, whatever the weather, and into a natural space if possible, provides a boost of vitamin D, a hit of endorphins and reminds us we’re part of an ecosystem full of marvels. And, when you get back to that blanket, it’ll feel even cosier!

The most important thing we can do to take care of our emotional selves at any time of year is to let someone know how we feel. This is getting easier, but words like ‘disorder’ still have stigma’s sting. If you are experiencing difficult thoughts and feelings and need someone to talk to, our talented team of counsellors can help. 

Thank you for reading.

Malachy, Lifetime Therapy founder, counsellor and teacher